Friday, December 9, 2011

Our mentality

So far all these updates have pretty much just been about clinic appointments and his sodium intake that I have cut and pasted from my facebook page.  This one, however, is about how we are all dealing with his disease mentally.  It is not easy.  I have been looking back at facebook entries and can see myself getting a little weary as the days progress.  I know I have seen Jacob struggle too with irritability and some depression.  Now, I know some of it is attributed to the medication, but come on, what 13 year old boy wouldnt naturally feel a little down when his world has just been turned upside down?  He went from a healthy teen to one that takes medication three times a day and monitoring his BP and sodium intake.  What a bummer that is! 
The rest of the family is showing some frustration too.  The oldest at college is a little removed from the situation, but she still texts just to check up on her little brother.  In fact, when he was in the hospital that first night, she was in a panic trying to find a ride back home to be with him.  I convinced her to stay at school.  Five hours is a long drive to make and what could she have done?

My middle girl is normally moody, but her mood swings are a little more frequent lately.  I noticed she is always tired and also has been complaning about body aches more frequently. We will probably be getting her checked out soon, but my guess is that all of this adjustment to the family is just wearing her out.  I pray it is nothing more serious than that! 

Joe is also showing some frustration.  He is a middle school teacher and this year has been especially challenging.  He can tell you about that if he chooses.

It is not just the disease though that is stressing our family, I have to admit.  We also are moving across town.  What was supposed to be a stress free move has been nothing but stressful.  Here it is almost a month later and we STILL are not completely out of the other house AND there are boxes and bins everywhere here and in the garage to be sorted and arranged.

And we have gotten the first of the medical bills.  Wow!  Shocker to say the least!  For one night at the first hospital, we owe about $2000.  The bills from the physicians havent even reached us yet.  I am afraid to see what the bill is going to look like from the other know, the one we stayed at for seven days!  Oh well, it is what it is...

Oh and did I mention that I am not only working full time, but also a part time graduate student?  This is my first semester and let's just say it has not been fun trying to juggle all of the above with school added in. 

Yesterday, I think we all reached our point.  I cried off and on all evening.  What was the last straw was that there was a mix up with something for next semester of school and that was it.  I had reached my point.  I could not take it anymore.  I do not know what the other four's breaking point, but that was mine.  Joe is tired of living out of two houses.  He is done.  Our daughter had a fight with her best friend. She was close to tears all night.  Jacob is having to adjust to two new medications (which will be discussed in the next post) and is tired of the low sodium diet. 

We were done. 

But do you know what I love about my family?  Most times we bicker and argue, but last night, we just kept hugging.  Random hugs were given to all by all and frequently during the night.  We just comforted each other.  I love them.

Today, I decided that it needed to be a stress free evening. When I picked up the kids I announced that we needed a stress free evening, away from the boxes, away from the diet, away from it all, even just for a few hours.  Tonight we went bowling for 90 minutes.  Tonight we ate pizza that we did not make ourselves.  Tonight we laughed at our ridiculously low bowling scores.  Tonight we bickered and argued and smiled....until the bowling alley started filling up and Joe got worried that he may see a student who would come up to him and start talking...and he did NOT want that.  So maybe the last 10 minutes were not so stress free for Joe, but the rest of it...we did not feel stressed....and it was good.

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