Monday, February 20, 2012

The phases of grieving

Depending on what website or book you read, people go through stages of grief.  Some say there are 5, some say 7.  Joe and I were talking last night about Jacob and I think he is somewhat working through these stages with dealing with the diagnosis.  I glanced at the stages and although he has not done them in the order some sites show, he definitely has hit on some of them.

He was in shock when first diagnosed.  I think we all were. How could a relatively healthy kid get such a diagnosis.  I mean, it is not a cancer diagnosis, but this is a chronic disease, one that he has to deal with the rest of his life.  This was a shock, for sure.

He was then depressed.  I would say that most of the depression was contributed to the medication he was on, but even after the meds were discontinued, you could see a bit of the depression lingering.  Can you blame him though?

Now, he seems to be angry.  Again, we dont blame him.  He is angry that he got the disease and that it is chronic.  He is angry he has to take medication. He is angry that he has to limit his sodium (although I explained to him that his sodium limitation is really what a healthy adult should consume).  He even mentioned his anger towards God the other day.  It was just a passing comment, but this is what really clued us in on his anger.  This is something he has to work on.  He doesnt express his anger often.  Thirteen is a hard age for any kid and to add a chronic disease to the mix can bring about trouble.  Right now his anger is controllable.  He takes his medications like he is supposed to and he watches his sodium intake VERY well (freakishly well if you ask me). It is just the random comments he makes that clues us in on his mood.  I am not overly concerned, but will be keeping a close eye on that kid.

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